Incorporating gags, or any form of BDSM play, into you sex life can make things that much more exciting. But before you experiment, it’s important to know a little bit about what you’re doing.
In this stream, dominatrix Mistress Mona Darling talks to us all about gags and how to play with them safely.
Before doing any kind of gag or bondage play, it’s important to establish safety rules, boundaries, and to make sure everything is consensual. “Even if somebody's got a gag in their mouth, they should be able to express their safe word to you,” says Mistress Mona. Some people like to have a bell, or to just flash their hands, signaling they want to be let go. Any gesture will do, so long as you and your partner are able to communicate.
So, why would you want to be gagged? It can be a very sensual experience since the mouth is an erogenous zone with many nerve-endings. Gagging can be just about playing with that area, not about silencing someone. Sometimes, however, being silenced and being made submissive is part of the experience. This can invoke other sensations, like vulnerability and connection
If you’re new to using gags, experimenting with scarves — which can be fun for bondage as well as gags — can be a good start. They are often just around the house, or inexpensive to buy. You simply can wrap it around the mouth a couple times and tie it. Have a pair of safety scissors on hand so you can easily cut a person free when needed. You can also use a scarf for bondage restraints and to tie up somebody’s hands or feet.
Mistress Mona then demonstrates some fancier gags, some with a silicon coated bar for people to bite on, a mouth-led leash, a tray attached so the submissive person can bring the dom things — all this helps aid humiliation or slave play. If you’re going to use other materials to gag or silence someone, make sure they can always breathe and swallow. Using a material like saran wrap tape can be good to cover someone’s mouth, so long as their nostrils are exposed. Mistress Mona suggests putting your panties in their mouth, then wrapping it up with packing wrap, then duct tape. This forces their mouth full, silences them, and forces them to smell and taste you — which can be very intimate.
You may want to try a dental gag as this does not restrict breathing, but instead forces everything wide open. You can also experiment with O-ring gags, which also hold the mouth open so you can touch or play with your partner, force them to eat, stick things in their mouth — whatever you and your partner are comfortable with.
No matter what kind of gag you’re using, Mistress Mona reminds us they don’t have to be scary, unless you and your partner want them to be. Gags can actually be very sensual and intimate — it just depends on how you use them.