Hand Sex
September 24, 2019

How to Give the Best Handjob, Ever

Explore the best handjob techniques for ultimate penis pleasure. Here’s how to get the right grip, rhythm, and motion!
Written by
O.team
Published on
September 24, 2019
Updated on
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Giving a good handjob may seem like a piece of cake, but having a few skills up your sleeve can go a long way in giving your partner explosive orgasms. From basics like palm-positioning to heavier topics like temperature play, we’ve got you covered. 

Ask Your Partner How They Want To Be Touched

It’s likely your partner has some sense of what they like: pressure, technique, rhythm, etc. Before you go diving into handling their body, start with a good old fashioned conversation

A few leading questions could include: what sort of pressure do you like? Do you like to have the entirety of your shaft played with, or do you like more focus on the head or tip? Do you like ball play? Lube or no lube? These will give you a few places to start.

Handjob Rhythm Is Crucial 

You can slow down or speed up as a way to tease your partner, but keep your stroking somewhat consistent. This means building up a rhythm that keeps your hand or hands busy and prioritizes building pleasure over time, versus going fast and furious and then stopping because you get tired. 

Slow down or speed up as a way to tease your partner.

A soft touch, but firm grip, can be really satisfying--just make sure to check in with your partner. If they’re into dirty talk, you can even ask them sexy questions about if they like what you’re doing as you’re doing it. Two birds, one stone!

To that end, steady, consistent rhythm allows you to pace yourself and take care of your wrists as needed. After all, this should be fun, not taxing, for you as well!

Stay Engaged During A Handjob

A good handjob can be a time-intensive endeavor, and that can be really hot! However, if you find yourself in the handjob zone for the long haul, keep your face and body language engaged and encouraging. 

Nothing is worse than your partner thinking you’re disinterested, or that they’re taking too long. After all, it’s not always about the destination! It’s equally about the journey. 

Switch Up Your Handjob Techniques

Finding a good stroking rhythm is part of the fun of handjobs, but another component is how delightful it can be to change it up a little. While keeping your strokes consistent with your dominant hand, use your free hand to play with your partner’s balls, lightly caressing them with the pads of your fingers, or even the edges of your fingernails (note: ask your partner first if this is okay). 

While keeping your strokes consistent with your dominant hand, use your free hand to play with your partner’s balls.

If you know your sweetheart is into ass play, you can take this opportunity to use one finger to penetrate them, or just play with the area between their scrotum and anus. 

Have a partner who isn’t into having their testicles or ass played with? That’s okay, too. You can still switch it up, utilizing soft touch on their inner thighs, hips, or lower back. Whatever they like!

To Lube Or Not To Lube?

Not everyone likes a slippery handjob, but some really do! If your partner falls into the latter category, then you can explore together what type of lubrication works for both of you--regular lube, spit, or even straight up hand lotion can suffice, but the research is half the fun. 

Finding yourself particularly excited about lube? There are some lubricants that contain trace amounts of cooling or warming materials that provide extra sensations for the user. If you are you partner are looking to experiment with slight temperature variations during play, this could be a good gateway!

Do The Handjob Twist

Found your consistent rhythm but looking to switch up a little? Incorporate a little twist at the end of your strokes, just like they do in porn. Simply turn your hand and wrist as you stroke downward towards the base of their shaft. 

Incorporate a little twist at the end of your stroke… turn your hand and wrist as you stroke downward towards the base of their shaft. 

You can even use two hands for maximum coverage and to make your partner feel particularly cared for. The extra twist at the end provides a little bit of variation in sensation. 

No matter what technique you decide to employ, have fun! Make sure to communicate your ergonomic needs to your partner, and to listen to any specific things they particularly enjoy or are interested in trying.

Reviewed for Medical Accuracy

The O.school team is here to provide you with the most medically-accurate information around sex, sexual wellness, pleasure, relationships, and dating. Every article we publish is vetted by our medical review board, ensuring that readers are provided with answers you can trust.

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