Contrary to how others might have made you feel, you don't have to avoid sex on your period.
Some people might experience a drop in desire during menstruation, others might actually experience a spike. It can seem like a cruel joke to experience high levels of desire during a time when some people tell you you can’t have sex.
Sure, for some folks, sex on a period doesn’t sound great. Severe menstrual pain, menstruation-induced gender dysphoria (something that trans masculine folks who menstruate might experience when their period begins), and the potential mess are just some reasons why folks might not want to have sex during their period.
But for others, having sex on their period is perfectly fine. It may be potentially messier, but it isn’t unclean. In the United States, we as a society are still pretty spooked by menstruation, so the reasons we’ve devised to not have period sex aren’t medical — they’re social. We tend to hide conversations about menstruation away — people tuck tampons into their sweatshirt sleeves as they run to the bathroom, we use euphemisms like “on the rag” and “my Aunt Flo is in town.”
All of those things contribute to menstrual stigma, which in turn makes it feel like periods just aren’t normal — so how could having sex on your period be okay?
Despite the stigma, period sex can be intimate and downright fun, and it can even help relieve pain. That said, everyone’s experience with period sex is different.
So, we asked the internet (mainly Instagram):
What does period sex really feel like? Here are some responses we got:
Note that some participants requested to stay anonymous to protect their privacy.
1. Period sex is a liberating experience.
“It feels great & liberating” — @erica_campossexed
When the patriarchy is telling you that menstruation is gross, engaging in some carefree sex is exactly the antidote to turn to. Telling the patriarchy to “boy bye” while you live your best stigma-free life is exactly the vibe that you deserve.
2. It’s basically massage therapy.
“Extra lubricated, really good, the way a massage feels on tight muscles” — Anonymous
During menstruation, your muscles can swell and cramp —and your vagina is a muscle. Plus, orgasms are the rapid contraction and release of your pelvic floor muscles, so if you’re going for O, it makes sense that period sex would feel like a massage!
3. Sometimes it’s pretty slippery...
“It feels great! Very WET in a good way. No need for lube” — @paraiso_rosado
You can leave your bottle of lube in the nightstand, but that doesn’t mean you’ll be feeling some unpleasant friction.
“Extra slippery, but in a good way because all that lube makes having an orgasm easier” — @la_chatel
4. ...and sometimes it’s sticky
“Great but stickier than normal” — @mauve_egret
Depending on how heavy your flow is, menstrual fluid can be slippery or sticky, and that can change throughout your cycle. Plus, when blood dries, it goes through a tacky phase. In this case, you can opt to use some lube!
5. You might feel some drips
“As a person with a penis, with my current partner I’ve described it as a dripping sensation.” — @phsycoremix
You or your partner might be lucky enough to feel some menstrual blood move past your cervix and into the vaginal canal, which is honestly pretty freaking cool.
6. Or it might not feel that different (physically, at least)
“Not much different than usual but I’m a [cisgender] guy. Seeing my dick covered in menstrual blood is fun and doesn’t gross me out at all” — @lineswiggly
While some people may be able to actually feel the release of menstrual fluid, to others, it might not be as apparent. Even if things don’t feel physically different to the person who isn’t menstruating, they still might feel psychologically different. Some people may even think it’s cool to see your menstrual blood on them, the same way that some folks love to see cum on their partners.
7. It might be a bit messy
“Messy (as in untidy not dirty)... but nothing is really that fun unless you get a little messy.” — Anonymous
Period sex may not be morally dirty, but it can still be a bit messy in practice. Prepare for your sheets to get some blood on them. If you want to avoid stain treatment, just throw down a towel! Besides, who doesn’t like a little mess every once in a while?
8. But you can keep it tidy, too
“We usually take things into the shower here, so I appreciate mixing up the setting!” – Anonymous
If you really want to avoid doing laundry, take your playtime into the shower. It’s like a two-in-one!
9. You might feel extra sensitive
“Extra intense! Everything feels softer in my cervix which makes me more sensitive.” — rover_clover (Approved)
If you’re someone who is fascinated by all that your body is able to do, having period sex is like a master class in “Whoa! I can feel that?!”
10. It’s the best thing since sliced bread.
“The best thing to happen when I’m on my period. Like therapeutic.” — Anonymous
Forget heating pads, Midol, Epsom salt baths, and exercise. When it comes to menstrual relief, period sex is where it’s at.
11. It’s pretty intimate
“Well lubricated lmao. It’s good, maybe even more intimate, and helps with cramps” — @thegiftofgab (Approved)
Having period sex with someone can feel incredibly personal, which makes sense when you consider the internalized (and external) stigma you might be processing to actually get down to business. Plus, the partnered pain relief component can feel extra personal.
12. Basically, period sex is everything.
“Definitely slippery, exciting, loving, and physical relief and care” — @a.driananoemi
A little messy, a lot of pleasure, and a whole ‘lotta liberation. If you’re still thinking about it, grab a towel and get to it!